First let me say that I am straight and not gay at all. Gay sex is for animals and I am not into that but I do like to think about it while I jerk off.
My favorite booze is anything I can get my hands on. Often times I find myself out of booze so I have to make do. On those times I have drank Listerine and scope with good results though the hangovers last for days. One way to deal with these multiple day hangovers is to just keep drinking, and this works for me. Pourable cheese products will work good too.
Masturbating while drunk is awesome. Occasionally I will draw a face on my hand an pretend that it is Matt Damon or some hot actor. I am straight though and I don’t want anyone to think I am a fag or something like that because I am not. Fags are gross and should be banished to some desert island or something. Anyway masturbating while I am drunk is the bomb. One time I accidentally thought about Oprah while I was masturbating and I almost got sick but that might have been the booze.