Archive for the ‘Masturbate-a-Thon’ Category

I’m Back and Ready to Mount Up!

June 22, 2009

It has been a while since I posted anything and for that I have to say to you TOO FUCKING BAD!

Actually after the Jack-A-Thon I was pretty wiped out. I blew more loads in a few hours than I ever have before and it took a couple weeks to get the urge to jerk it again. And then it happened. Or didn’t happen to be more accurate.

I was so backed up after the Jack-A-Thon that I didn’t take a shit for almost two weeks and when I finally managed to work that bad boy out I was wasted. I tried bran, raisins, prunes, chopsticks, a spoon and the garden hose but nothing would make it budge. I finally gave up hope and thought I might have to actually have anal sex to stir shit up (pun intended) but I woke up one morning with a turtle head of massive proportions poking out my ass. After an explosive movement I am back to normal.

This is a photo of the last movement. I like to call it Mitch’s Last Movement in C Minor because that’s the key I was screaming in when it fianlly let loose.

Now, back to masturbating. Anyone have any good suggestions of things I can stick my dick into? And nobody better suggest peanut butter or a tub of Crisco because I have already tried both.


Just like a walk-a-thon but with lube and tissues…

April 30, 2009

IT’S THAT TIME OF YEAR AGAIN!!!! I am going to seriously compete this year. Last year I blew a load 12 FUCKING FEET! I have been practicing and I know I can beat that distance (pun intended) this year.


  • Saturday, May 2, 2009
  • General Performers & Admission: 3:00 pm – 10:00 pm
    Longevity Competitors: 12:00 pm until the record is broken!
2009 Masturbate-a-thon Competitions
  • Longest Squirt Distance
    An area will be set up so that participants can compete for longest squirting/ejaculation distance. This will be a mixed gender event and whoever goes the fluid distance wins! This contest will be held at 7 pm.
  • Longest Time Spent Masturbating
    How long can people masturbate? Well, the current record is over 8 hours. Bend your gender expectations; that participant was 100% male. Winners will be awarded in as many gender categories as are appropriate.
  • Most Orgasms
    Multiple orgasms aren’t just for females. The Masturbate-a-Thon record for most male orgasms is 6! Of course, women are a little ahead in this game with a record of 49 orgasm in a single masturbate-a-thon event. Wow! Men, women and any other declared gender category will compete for their own multi-orgasmic titles.
  • Tag Team Fun
    This is a tag team race like you have never seen. Team members tag each other for a place change in the masturbation arena.


You can get more information here!